Pick Up Lines for the Backyard Homesteader

Here you will find funny, silly and hilarious pick up lines for the backyard homesteader for teens and adults.

A tractor? That's what I'm trying to do!
Are you a chicken farmer? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock.
Are you a decomposing pile? Cause you look hot.
  • Farmer
  • Submitted by: Bennett O.
Are you a dozer, because I want you to plow me all night.
Are you as loud as your chickens?
Are you sustainable agriculture? Cuz you're all I need to survive.
Baby, we'll never have to run to the store for milk.
Baby, why don't you come on over here and ride my horse.
Boy are you a tractor? Cause you'd make life on the farm easier.
  • Farmer
  • Submitted by: marisa remini
Can i grow some of you on my farm?

Can I plow you instead of this field?
Can this hog feast in your slop tonight.
Come on baby, gimme your seed.
Cottons not the only thing i'll be picking up tonight.
Do you combine here often?
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket? Cause I'm diggin that ass!
Do you live in a cornfield? Because I'm stalking you.
Do you want to check out my home quarter?
Do you want to plow this field?

Do you want to see the most carrots you've ever seen in your life?
Does your father spray pesticides? Because you look like you sprinkled down from heaven.
Forget the 100 mile diet, we do the 100 yard diet.
  • Farmer
  • Submitted by: A. Stignei
Hey baby, I'd love to hand pollinate you!
Hey, I'm outta work and I heard ya needed some plowing.
How about I wear these Carhartts and we plant seeds together.
How about we go over to my beds and spread some of my heirloom seeds.
How many horses can you fit in your barn?
How many native pollinators do you have at your place?

How would you like to switch the gears of my tractor?
I don't normally sow wild oats, but for you I'd make an exception.
I don't want to milk this but... I wouldn't pick anyone udder than you! You da tits!
I find myself grazing deep into your eyes.
I get fresh eggs daily.
  • Farmer
  • Submitted by: harry.potter
I got invited to the steak dinner at the John Deere dealer.
I have a crockpot and I know how to use it.
I have a job opening for an inseminator.
I have a six pack and an empty buddy seat.

I have celeriac seedlings in the back of my car.
I have the biggest power shaft in town.
I have the equipment to plow all night long.
I have to admit: work gloves feel kind of sexy.
I like to plant DEEP!
I love Feeding local wide life.
I wanna put your pork on my fork.
I want you to taste my cheese.
I will grow you, thresh you, bale you, and set you out to feed the oxen.

I wish I could harvest you at peak season.
I would love to grease your fittings...
I would love to see the way you farm.
I would love to take you out on a date. I am 'outstanding' in my field.

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